As we draw close to Gracie's first birthday, I feel such sadness to not be able to celebrate the first Christmas and birthday. I have been doing a lot of reading of my blog lately and remembering the last weeks and day she was born into the arms of Jesus. I find comfort in knowing that she is perfect in Heaven and that we will be reunited some day, but it doesn't always make it easy or make me feel less sad. I wish she was here with me and Corey.
The following excerpt is taken from a blog, which I attached the link if you would like to read the whole thing, it is written by a widow. I found such comfort in this and reminder that grieving is okay and good.
"I think it is important to note here that we should not assume someone is no longer grieving, or not grieving as much, because a number of years have passed. I am among those who, before I became a widow, mistakenly thought that the one-year anniversary marked the end of the grieving process, that somehow things became easier and got back to “normal.” Where did that idea come from? That’s not accurate. I believe grieving is actually a gift, a good and necessary gift, a process, and a journey that, because of the depth of our love, may last until I see my Bud again. And, yes, the severity of my grieving is increased during the holidays. But as I respond to the pain and embrace with gratefulness the comforts he sends, I learn endurance and perseverance; and I realize that everything is part of the process of sanctification. And I am overwhelmed—not by my grief—but by his love for me."
http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/comfort-at-christmastime1
I am only approaching the first year, but I feel my heart will feel this sadness for as long as I am here on this earth, like the writer mentioned the one year doesn't mean the end of grieving.
Grieving the loss of a child is a process, it begins the day your child passes and ends the day the parent joins them.~B.J.Karrer
Please remember to say a prayer for all those that have lost a loved one, especially those recent unexplainable losses in our nation.
A friend shared this sweet picture that she had found online with me the other day...so true for me.
I can tell you that the grieving doesn't end after the first year or the second or even the third, but it gets easier. Even when you think that you have come through it something out of the blue will remind you or make you sad. You will always miss her and think about her, she is your daughter. You are a wonderful mother and a very strong woman. I am glad that you are my friend and so glad that you have let so many people walk with you and Corey through this time in your life and that you could let God's light shine even on the darkest days. He will bless you and you may never really know how many lives you and Gracie have touched, but you are such an inspiration.
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