Soft Pink

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

4 years ago...

4 years ago today I gave birth to an angel. Gracie Ann had already passed prior to this day, but today was the day I gave birth to her. One of the hardest things I have done. God has truly blessed me with 2 handsome wonderful boys since this day 4 years ago. 

I think about her every day and the sadness hasn't changed. I read a saying in one of the grief books or blogs 4 years ago, that the pain/sadness doesn't go away, we just make room for it in our heart to stay. This is what I have done. 

A few weeks ago, I went to the Nutcracker with girlfriends. I couldn't help but think that this is something I would be doing with Gracie. I wore the bracelet my mom gave me with her initials and other charms. I felt as if I was bringing her with me in spirit. I wish she was her with me to do these type of girl things with me. I am more than thankful though that she felt no pain and that she is healthy in Heaven. I know I will see her again and that keeps me going. 

I have seen others go through infant/child loss, but I have also found amazing stories of infants living with Trisomy 18 and anencephaly. Amazing stories! I continue to share my story, but I always love sharing the stories of the few that are defying the odds doctors give. Choose life, because you just don't know how God's decision is going to play out and we shouldn't decide that for our babies. We should let them and God write their stories. God never leaves us nor forsakes us, "Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6


I wrote in my blog today for those you might not have know me during this time and thought if you wanted to you could read past posts and see pictures of Gracie that I had shared. 

Also, Timehop has been a great reminder of all the encouraging words my friends and family shared with me. You were all a blessing to me during this time. Thank you.